From Pendawn <Osu@sgarden.demon.co.uk>
Date: Wed, 29 Oct 1997 17:01:13 +0000
Subject: (LABB) ID4 2

*************************************

Kristin was right!! The aliens are here to take our DOOF!!!!!!

However while everyone else was running for cover, I lingered in the the street...well, I needed t tie my shoelace, and I was quite enjoying the view, it was like being in a 3D Independance Day!!

Anyway, amongst all the screaming and running and crashing, as I stood in the street, I heard this voice say "want a cigarrette?" I turned round to see one of the Aliens nonchalantly leaning against a cheesy wall, holding out a pack of cigarrettes.

Being the good girl I am, I politely refused the offer of the smoke (My mum told me never to take presents from aliens, you never know WHERE they've been), and he told me his name was Derek and that he was having a bad day. He said he didn't like all this fighting and shouting, he'd rather be home reading a magazine, with his feet up.

Anyway as he was talking I eyed him suspiciously. Being vigliant against any mind control thingummy's, adn hidden weapons I was checking his every laid back move.

It was only after a few minutes I noticed a strange familiarity about him, I think it was the straggly blonde hair, and the twinkly eyes.....sure his face is green, but......he looks kinda like...um....woh is it again?.....

THAT'S IT!!!! He bears an uncanny resmblance to CHR*S C*RT*R!!!! In fact all the aliens do!!!!

WWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I'm suddenly far more scared than when I thought they were just aliens!!

Dawn/Osu

From Carson Maynard <haem@katie.vnet.net>
Date: Wed, 29 Oct 1997 23:47:09 -0500 (EST)
Subject: [LABB] Curious Hamsters Unearth Cherokee Keyrings

Teso Taco Loco Hospital
LABBVille
October 29, 1997

DAWN: *yawn*
ROSE: [bored] That rhymes.
JANET: What does?
ROSE: "Dawn" and "yawn".
DAWN: I'm sorry. I was tired, okay?
ROSE: Well, you don't have to get all snippy about it!
DAWN: Well, you don't have to make fun of me!
ROSE: I can make fun of you if I want to! [does an outrageous Scottish accent] Och, aye, I'll take ma wee bonnie bairn tae the loch, ye ken...?
DAWN: Stop it, stop it! [bursts into tears]
NURSE FENITY: [rushing out] What *is* all the commotion in here?!

[everyone spoke at the same time]

DAWN: Rose was making fun of me!
ROSE: She yelled at me first!
JANET: I've run out of cappuccino!
TRILL: I missed Ally on Monday!
CHRIS: I wanna arrest someone!
SAMI: EnCat won't let me play Hanson!
ENCAT: Sami won't let me play TMBG!
IAN: Queen Thud stole my raspberry beret!
QUEEN THUD:
DEBI: [from her room] Make the elves stop stealing planes! BATS!!! BATS!!!
NURSE FENITY: Now, now, I know you're all tired of waiting.
DAWN: I'm so sleepy! I want a *real* bed!
JANET: Yeah, with a big fluffy feather pillow!
TRILL: And a nice clone bringing me a glass of hot milk!
SAMI: And a huge warm comforter!
QUEEN THUD:
EVERYONE ELSE: Exactly!
NURSE FENITY: Well, I have good news for you all. We're ready to start taking the blood samples, and then you can go...home. Back to your...cheese huts. [tries to stifle a giggle] Ahem. So, who's first?
ROSE: Me! I wanna get this over with! [marches into the room]

[one by one, all the lab mice filed into the room to get blood samples taken]

JANET: What about Carson?
NURSE FENITY: Oh, I got a blood sample from him first. A few days ago, actually.
SAMI: Well, where is he?
NURSE FENITY: [mysteriously] Penni has...plans...for him.
TRILL: That silly Penni.
CHRIS: Penni...?
ENCAT: You'll find out.

[Penni flounced in, followed by RJ and the female Pendrell clone. Chris' eyes practically popped out of their sockets when he spied the clone.]

CHRIS: *Wow.*
UNNAMED FEMALE CLONE: [demure grin] Hi...
CHRIS: What's your name?
UNNAMED FEMALE CLONE: I don't know.
CHRIS: [balking] Uh...oh...okay...well, I like a mysterious woman as much as the next guy.
PENNI: So, how are all my favoritest little meeces doing today?
EVERYONE: [growls] Not...well!
PENNI: [oblivious] Oh, goody! I just knew it! And guess what? I have exciting news! I'm thinking of starting my own day care center! What do you think of this: "Mister or Miss Penni's Day Care". It just has a *wonderful* ring to it, don't you think?
DEBI: Ack!!!
PENNI: I'm not sure where the kids will come from...maybe Sarah the baby mousie and Uni's wonderful little one will attend.
ENCAT: I'm sure CiCi will have something to say about that...
PENNI: Oh, and one more thing! Everyone, meet our latest clone! Hi!!!
EVERYONE: [reluctantly] Hi.
UNNAMED FEMALE CLONE: Hello everyone. I'm really looking forward to getting to know you all and living here in this wonderful burned down town of cheese. And getting an owner.

[Nurse Fenity rushed out of her little room, quite frantic]

NURSE FENITY: It...it...didn't work! *sob* The cure didn't work!
DEBI: I am clone, hear me roar BATS!!! BATS!!!
NURSE FENITY: Waaaaaaah! All my dreams, gone! My article in Science, gone! My Nobel Prize, gone! My Stinky Cheese Club of the Month subscription, gone forever!!! Dr Fuller Bull will be so mad!
RJ: So what do we do now?

[Suddenly, the door flew open! And standing there was a tall green creature with shoulder-length yellowish hair and a grille over its mouth!]

CREATURE: [with tinny voice filtered through translator grille] I am OokZa of the planet MineKiss. Surrender to me your plastic beakers!
CHRIS: Oh, cool, an alien!
EVERYONE ELSE: Eh. So what?
SAMI: It looks like... Chr*s C*rter!
EVERYONE ELSE: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

Carson Maynard :>

From Carson Maynard <haem@katie.vnet.net>
Date: Fri, 31 Oct 1997 23:49:08 -0500 (EST)
Subject: [LABB] Ripped-Up Seaweed Tastes Yucky

[OokZa had left to fetch the glass beakers from his UFO, when suddenly things went crazy. Again.]

ROSE: I hope he hurries back.
ENCAT: Yeah...I want glass beakers!

[the lights, or what remained of them, started flickering on and off]

JANET: [whimpering] The ghosts of Teso Taco Loco are back?

[a chair screeched out of Debi's room and wedged itself against the front door]

CHRIS: Looks like it. What's with this place, anyway?

[a bar dropped from the ceiling, landing across the door handles]

SAMI: I guess someone doesn't want us to leave.
PENNI: Or they don't want that nice alien fellow to come back.
SAMI: Maybe.

[the lights all went out, even the street lights that were providing illumination through the darkened windows]

PENNI: Eek! Help! It's dark! I don't like the dark!

[thunder roared and lightning flashed]

PENNI: *squeal*
SAMI: [pointing] Look!

[There, at the other end of the hall and quickly advancing, were several spectral figures]

ROSE: That one looks like Flukeman!
TRILL: And there's - ewww! El chupacabra!
RJ: And that's Penni!!! I'm getting out of here!!!

[RJ ran to the door, struggled against the ghostly forces to pull away the chair and bar, and raced out into the dark rainy night. No sooner had he left than OokZa came in, carrying a crate of glass beakers!]

OOKZA: What got into him?

[all the lights snapped back on, and the diaphanous forms disappeared]

TRILL: Wow. That's better.
DAWN: So do you have the beakers?!
OOKZA: Yup. Right here. You ready to trade?

[Nurse Fenity came running into the room]

NURSE FENITY: I think I know what went wrong! I think I know what went wrong! We used plastic beakers, the stupid things, instead of glass! Well, of course we did. But I mean, I think the cure will work with glass beakers!

[Nurse Fenity grabbed several of the glass beakers and hurried back into Debi's room, slamming the door]

IAN: Wow, do you really think it'll work?
JANET: I guess we'll find out...

Carson Maynard :>

From Carson Maynard <haem@katie.vnet.net>
Date: Sun, 2 Nov 1997 12:24:22 -0500 (EST)
Subject: [LABB] Save the Sucking Chest Wound!

While everyone waited for Nurse Fenity to come out of Debi's room with news, the ghosts of Teso Taco Loco worked their magic, mostly on Chris. It seems they just didn't like him. Finally he got fed up with it and followed RJ out, saying something about going to find Mel. The others paced around, OokZa glared at everyone, until finally Nurse Fenity came back out with a big smile on her face.

NURSE FENITY: It worked! It worked!
DEBI: [behind her] ooooh...my head... Anyone have any Pez?

What will happen next? Only time, and my fellow saga writers, will tell!

Carson Maynard :>

From UNIBLOND99@aol.com
Date: Sun, 2 Nov 1997 23:02:43 -0500 (EST)
Subject: Re: {{{LABB}}} Tomorrow! Tomorrow!

***************************************************
Carson's last entry on story was:
NURSE FENITY: It worked! It worked!
DEBI: [behind her] ooooh...my head... Anyone have any Pez?
*************************************************************************
And so I was bombarded with Pez!! Yay!! Then:

OokZa: "Now!! Before we leave we need all the plastic beakers, the female Pendrell Clone as we want to spread *doofiness* all over our planet, Carson's shoes<don't know why> & in exchange all will be cured of the horrible illness!! Oh...we also need most of the *stinky cheese* for our fuel & some of CiCi's & Abree's *socks* please."
Penni: "Here's the female Pendrell clone!! No not me you doof..her!!"
Carson: "Here are my shoes!! Harumph!!"
Rose: "Here are the plastic beakers."
Queen Thud: ::::::grabs all the glass beakers!:::::::::
Janet: "Uh...here is the stinky cheese." <Janet hands over some doof kegs>
Brian: "Here are some of Abree's & CiCi's *socks* that you wanted."
Brinson: "Ahem..as the Royal Doof Distributor & God & Queen of my own world...Hey! OokZa! No Doof for you...ever!! Now be gone before we uh..er....uh..BE GONE TROLL!!" <in a *booming voice*>

At that the *Aliens* leave to go to wherever & all is well & safe in LabVille!! Now...Carson..you will be on Penni's show soon!!
******************************************************

Debi
*Penni still has my titles*
(Carson? What will you do without your shoes?? Penni says: "No worry!! You won't need them.")

From Carson Maynard <haem@katie.vnet.net>
Date: Sun, 2 Nov 1997 23:57:05 -0500 (EST)
Subject: [LABB] Sucking Chest Wounds Rule!

Now that OokZa's let me out of that little room - it sure is *bright* out here! - I can finally stretch a bit and catch up on what's happened. I'm somewhat annoyed that as soon as I got out, I had to give up my shoes, but...que sera sera! We tried Nurse Fenity's cure on Ian (told him it was a new kind of soft drink that we wanted him to try) but nothing happened. Fortunately OokZa left us some sort of alien compound in exchange for the socks and everything, so we fed that to Ian next.

IAN: Why are you so keen on me trying all these soft drinks, huh?
ME: Well...'cause...you have such sensitive taste buds!
IAN: Oh. Thank you.
ME: Drink up!
IAN: [downs the glass of alien compound, and shudders a bit] Yuck. That's even worse than the last one. [licks his lips] I have this sudden desire for something sugary and totally non-nutritious.
ME: Really?

[Dawn pulled out a big plastic bat and dangled it in front of Ian's face]

PENNI and BRIAN: Ack! BATS!!! BATS!!!
IAN: [swiping at it] Hey, don't do that!
DAWN: Aren't you...afraid of it, Ian?
IAN: No, why would I be? Bats are okay. I just don't want it hanging in my face!
ME: Woo-hoo! He's cured! Give that stuff to Penni and Brian!

So we've spent the afternoon curing clones...it looks like LABBVille will soon be back to normal!

Carson Maynard :>

From Carson Maynard <haem@katie.vnet.net>
Date: Mon, 3 Nov 1997 22:55:07 -0500 (EST)
Subject: [LABB] Time-Life Mysteries: The Sucking Chest Wound

I am pleased to announce that it seems that all of the clones are now free of the mysterious illness that caused them to idolize Perry Como, despise bats and Pez, and generally wreak havoc in LABBVille. Penni and Brian have apologized profusely for the trouble they caused, and have returned to their respective owners. Penni keeps promising me that heshe is going to do a Good Morning LABBVille show, but that hasn't come off yet...heshe's been telling me that since I was imprisoned with Sami, so I don't know if I believe hir... <g> Anyway, Penni hasn't promised to cease *all* mischief, but heshe seems to be penitent enough.

And we've lost our female clone, sniff sniff. I hope she'll have a good life with the aliens from MineKiss (who, by the way, are still hanging around...I think they intend to make good on their promise to steal our Doof!).

Well, anyway, all the bad stuff is over, so everyone's converged at the Beiserville Mouse Hole to celebrate. What a party!

SUE: CiCi, get down off that table! It's unbecoming to a woman of your position!
CICI: Woo woo! [twirling a feather boa and guzzling a Doof]
PENNI: Me too, me too! [gets up on the table and starts gyrating to the music]
BRIAN: Ewww, Penni, quit it, you're gonna make me sick.

[Penni stuck hir tongue out at Brian and stepped off the table]

CICI: All right, more room! Someone gimme another Doof!
ROSE: Hey, who told the jukebox to play Hanson?
SAMI: Hee hee...
TRILL: So Fay, is it okay if I watch Ally now?
FAY: [grumbling] Yeah, sure, go ahead. Just keep the volume down.
TRILL: Oh, like you'd hear it over this music?
FAY: True. Well, hey, why don't we put it on a table in the middle so everyone can watch it?
TRILL: Now you're talking!
PENWYN: So I've been sitting around here studying the past few days, and I think I'm ready to take the test!
ME: Really? That's fantastic, Penwyn!
IAN: I hope you pass! When do you take it?
PENWYN: In a few days...Special Agent Penwyn. I like the sound of that.
ME: Think you can get us a tour of the Pentagon basement?
JANET: Three cappuccinos with extra Doof!
DAWN: Ooh, that's me!
ROSE: And me!
QUEEN THUD:
JANET: Here you go. [hands them out]
DEBI: I just [munch] can't get enough [munch] Pez all of a sudden! [munch]
TIGER: Ooh, that luks gud. Kan I hav sum? [snatches some of Debi's Pez] Mmmmm. Yumi inn my tumi.
PERRY COMO: [entering in the front door] Did someone ask me to do a gig here tonight? [looking around]
PENNI: Oh, that was me, Perry dear! But don't worry...we don't need you now! Bye-bye! [shoves him out the door]
ENCAT: And so ends another happy LABB tale...
PENNI: Happy?! What do you mean, happy?! Have you *seen* my mascara lately?!
ODIE: It's great, Penni. Nice and chartreuse, just how you like it. Now c'mon, we're going home before you get drunk. [drags Penni out]
PENNI: Who on earth gets drunk on Shirley Temples...?
MAI: [bringing out a huge bathtub] All right, let's PARTY! [jumps into it] Ahhhh...
ABREE: My feet are cold. I need some socks.
PAUL: Well, don't look at me! You can't have mine.
ABREE: Hmmm, no problem. [grabs CiCi's socks]
CICI: Whoa! [topples over onto the table] Hey, let go! [wrestles with Abree] MY socks! MINE!
TRILL: Keep it down, I can't hear Ally!
FAY: Yeah, you guys, hush!
SAMI: Ally? I can't hear Hanson! MMMBop! MMMBop!
ENCAT: [trying again] And so ends another happy LABB tale...a tale of joy and sorrow, a tale of love and strife, a tale of friendship and betraya - uh...a tale of friendship. Hee hee.

[everyone partied the night away]

And so it ends!