1 June 1997 Doctor Who - The Art of Killing starring the fifth Doctor and Sarah Jane Smith abates (abates@wn.planet.gen.nz) - painting, Blue_Boy, paper_pulp DrGrace (judiang@idt.net) - Pom_Lady, __Lance_ Elsa (elsaf@psi.net) - _Doc_5_, _Lance_ GailPolly (gailpolly@icu.com) - SarahJane Haem (haem@lys.vnet.net) - MrCarter, Pendrell, Jakkelsen JGarth (jgarth@mb.ca) - Third_Extra_From_The_Left Meliphyre (mwhite@memphisonline.com) - CoffeeCellar -------------------------------------------------------------------------- ::teaser:: * painting hangs on the wall and winks. * MrCarter looks at the painting to make sure he has hung it straight Hmm, looks good. * MrCarter runs a hand through his long, surfer-boy hair and goes into his living room to do a bit more writing * MrCarter is very pleased with his latest purchase, and will have to show it to his wife when she returns home * painting starts morphing * Blue_Boy jumps out of the painting. * Blue_Boy looks around and hisses. * MrCarter starts the computer up and sits down * Blue_Boy scampers into the living room. * MrCarter is about to open the word processor when he hears a noise * MrCarter turns around * Blue_Boy launches itself onto Mr Carter's back. Aaah! * MrCarter jumps up and claws at the figure on his back * Blue_Boy begins throttling Carter. * MrCarter pulls at the hands around his throat, but they're supernaturally strong * MrCarter staggers to the kitchen and fumbles for a knife * Blue_Boy tightens its grip. * MrCarter tries to grab a knife, but is too weak and collapses to the floor, turning blue * MrCarter eventually expires, never having gotten to finish his script * Blue_Boy finishes strangling Carter. * Blue_Boy gets up, runs back to the painting, and morphs back in. * painting hangs innocently on the wall. * MrCarter's body lies on the floor, mysterious marks on its neck... ::opening credits:: * _Doc_5_ works at the TARDIS console... setting the coordinates for present-day Vancouver <_Doc_5_> Almost there... * SarahJane looks over Doc5's shoulder Good! I've never been to Vancouver. I hear it's a beautiful city. <_Doc_5_> And I think we're actually going to make it this time. Hmm, I suppose this regeneration has finally started getting the hang of steering the TARDIS, then? * SarahJane grins mischievously <_Doc_5_> Well, I have been practicing. * _Doc_5_ hits the materialization lever <_Doc_5_> There! We're here. * SarahJane gets her bolero jacket and is wearing a long skirt with boots Ready! * _Doc_5_ opens the doors * SarahJane steps out of the TARDIS <_Doc_5_> I think we'll visit the art fair first. * _Doc_5_ heads out into the fair Oh, Doctor, it's lovely out today! <_Doc_5_> Yes, perfect day to look at some art. * SarahJane looks around This is marvellous! * Third_Extra_From_The_Left comments on the TARDIS as bad art. * _Doc_5_ examines a booth with ceramics <_Doc_5_> What do you think, Sarah? Do we need a mug in the shape of a Dalek? * SarahJane grimaces at the Doctor * SarahJane giggles No, I don't think so -- are there any pepperpots though? * _Doc_5_ moves on and finds a booth of paintings <_Doc_5_> Now, that's odd... very odd indeed. What is? * _Doc_5_ looks closely at the painting in front of him * painting hangs there innocently. They're paintings -- what's odd about them? <_Doc_5_> This painting... it should be haning in the Chicago Institute of Arts. So? It's a knockoff. <_Doc_5_> If it's a copy, it's the best I've seen. Lots of people buy reproductions of famous paintings...you're not going to tell me you helped paint this or something, are you? <_Doc_5_> Well, just look at it... none of the usual signs of a reproduction. * Pendrell approaches the couple Hello, sir, ma'am. Could I interest you in one of our reproductions? <_Doc_5_> You're saying this is a copy? Who did it? If this is a copy, the copyist is a master! * SarahJane starts nervously and looks at the Doctor Of course. We only provide the best. I'm not certain who the artist is, however. The company handles that sort of thing. Um, you mean *a* master, not *the* Master, right? <_Doc_5_> *A* master, Sarah... really. So, how much are you asking for this painting? * SarahJane looks at the painting with fascination...it almost seems to beckon to her to buy it... They're two hundred dollars. Canadian, if you please. * SarahJane sways slightly <_Doc_5_> Two hundred dollars... * _Doc_5_ digs in his pockets * painting stares fixedly at Sarah. * SarahJane stares back at the painting... <_Doc_5_> Let me see, Alzarian fnerks are about 3 to $50 so 12 fnerks would about cover it. Hmmm, but you want it in Canadian money, don't you? Yes, please, sir. * _Doc_5_ looks at Sarah <_Doc_5_> Do you have any local funds? * SarahJane starts Er, hmmm? <_Doc_5_> Money, Sarah, do you still have any of that Earth money I gave you? Oh! Money! Yes. * Pendrell looks over Earth money? * Pendrell laughs * SarahJane leans over to Pendrell He's...he's British. * Pendrell nods to Sarah, as if that explains everything <_Doc_5_> My companion will pay you. * SarahJane takes out her money from her shoulderbag How much do you need, Doctor? <_Doc_5_> $200... Canadian. * _Doc_5_ whispers: <_Doc_5_> A real bargain, Sarah, that's only about $150 American. * painting flashes a grin when no one's looking. * SarahJane counts out the money and hands it to Pendrell * SarahJane smiles at Pendrell There you go. * Pendrell accepts it, counts through it again, then smiles at Sarah Thank you very much, ma'am. Enjoy your painting. <_Doc_5_> We'll just take this back to our TA... car. Well, Doctor? You're carrying that thing, you know! * _Doc_5_ whispers to Sarah as they walk away <_Doc_5_> We'll return it to the Chicago Institute of Arts. It must have been stolen. * painting dangles under the Doctor's arm. * _Doc_5_ hits an unwary art patron with the painting as he turns <_Doc_5_> Oh, sorry. Stolen?? Do you mean I just bought fenced property?? <_Doc_5_> Well, it must be. This is no reproduction, Sarah, and I'm certain it's the property of the Chicago museum. Well, if it's real, be careful! You just whacked a passerby with it! * painting looks undamaged. * painting looks for a passerby to goose. * _Doc_5_ leans the painting up against the TARDIS as he unlocks the door <_Doc_5_> We'll just pop over to Chicago and return it. Hmm. I don't even think I want to ask HOW you propose to just pop in and hand over a stolen painting. * _Doc_5_ opens the TARDIS door I'm not in any mood to be locked up in a jail cell tonight. * SarahJane walks into the console room <_Doc_5_> We'll just walk in and ask to speak to the curator. They aren't anywhere near as thorny about accepting returned things as they are when you steal them. * _Doc_5_ leans the painting up against the wall <_Doc_5_> I'll just set the coordinates. * SarahJane finds herself drawn to the painting again * _Doc_5_ doesn't pay any attention to the painting * painting winks at Sarah. * SarahJane starts in suprise * painting begins morphing. <_Doc_5_> Now, when would be a good time to arrive? Doctor...? * Blue_Boy launches out of the painting and attaches to Sarah. Doctor??? <_Doc_5_> Just a moment, Sarah... I need to concentrate on this to have an accurate landing. DOCTOR!!!!!!!!! <_Doc_5_> Yes? * Blue_Boy hisses. * SarahJane screams * _Doc_5_ looks up <_Doc_5_> Really, Sarah... * Blue_Boy wraps stubby digits around Sarah's neck. * _Doc_5_ is surprised to see the painting has changed * SarahJane is struggling and gasping for help * _Doc_5_ rushes over and pries at the Blue Boy's fingers <_Doc_5_> LET GO OF HER! * Blue_Boy hisses up at the Doctor. * Blue_Boy has painted saliva dangling from its mouth. * SarahJane manages to get an elbow jab to BlueBoy's ribs * Blue_Boy falls free of Sarah. * SarahJane stumbles forward and falls against the TARDIS console * _Doc_5_ stands between Sarah and her attacker * Blue_Boy hisses and launches itself at the Doctor. * _Doc_5_ struggles with the Blue Boy * Blue_Boy reaches for the Doctor's neck. * _Doc_5_ grabs the Blue Boy's hands and forces them away * _Doc_5_ slams his attacker back against the painting frame * Blue_Boy struggles against the frame. * Blue_Boy finds itself sucked back into the picture. * _Doc_5_ pushes the Blue Boy back into the frame and turns the painting down against the floor, holding it down with his foot * painting bounces against the Doctor's foot. * SarahJane rushes back over next to the Doctor, still trying to regain her breath <_Doc_5_> Quick, Sarah, press the blue button on the TARDIS console! * painting makes snarling, hissing noises. <_Doc_5_> We need to reinstate the temporal grace field! * SarahJane runs over and hurriedly looks for and presses the blue button * painting stops struggling. <_Doc_5_> There... that should quiet it down for a bit. I think we're going to have to find out where this came from. I'm going to take us back to Vancouver. WHAT ever was that??? IS that! <_Doc_5_> I really don't know WHAT it is. Well, can you please put it OUT of the TARDIS *before* you start trying to find out? That thing is dangerous and creepy! <_Doc_5_> We can't just put it out, Sarah. Who knows who it's going to attack? WHO? <_Doc_5_> Just a moment. Keep a foot on this while I go get some equipment. Are you kidding?? No way! * _Doc_5_ goes through the interior doors OY! * SarahJane leaps onto the painting with both feet as the Doctor leaves her stranded * painting cracks loudly at the weight. * _Doc_5_ returns quickly with some electronic components <_Doc_5_> Now, if I can just rig a stasis field. If this is a living thing, a stasis field will disable it. If it's a mechanical artifact... well, that's different. * _Doc_5_ twiddles with his components * _Doc_5_ attaches a lead to the picture frame <_Doc_5_> There... now step back, Sarah. * SarahJane gratefully steps off the painting * _Doc_5_ watches the picture to see if it stays still * painting remains stuck in a grotesque contortion. <_Doc_5_> There, it seems it IS a living thing. Now, back to Vancouver to talk to the merchant we bought it from. * painting sneers when no one's looking. Ohh, it looks horrible right now -- that won't look right at the Art Institute. Everyone will *know* something is amiss! <_Doc_5_> Yes, seems I was mistaken about it being from Chicago. * SarahJane decides she will take some photographs of Blue Boy looking as he never looked before <_Doc_5_> I'll just put a continuous power feed to the stasis field and we can leave it here while we look for the person who sold it to us. * _Doc_5_ pulls the materialization lever <_Doc_5_> We're here! * _Doc_5_ opens the doors. <_Doc_5_> Come on, Sarah, we need to find that merchant before the fair closes. * SarahJane pulls a small camera out of her purse and snaps off a couple of shots of the painting * painting remains motionless. * _Doc_5_ heads into the art fair * SarahJane falls into step behind the Doctor * SarahJane and Doctor have left the painting behind in the TARDIS * painting begins morphing again. * Blue_Boy jumps free of the painting and savagely kicks the stasis field apparatus. * _Doc_5_ goes to where he thinks he remembers buying the painting <_Doc_5_> I know that booth must be around here somewhere. * SarahJane looks around the area Yes, Doctor, right HERE. * _Doc_5_ looks at a blank spot where there is no longer a booth We're next to the ceramics booth. You showed me that ceramic piece right there. He's gone! * _Doc_5_ goes to the ceramics booth <_Doc_5_> Excuse me, can you tell me where the gentleman from the painting booth went? Painting booth? <_Doc_5_> The next booth over. They had what looked like a perfect reproduction of the Blue Boy. * SarahJane takes a couple of holiday snaps, actually photographing where the booth used to be <_Doc_5_> I bought it for $200 Canadian. We've had a spot of trouble with the painting, now, and I'd like a word with the fellow who sold it. The next booth over - oh, you mean the funnel-cake stand. * Jakkelsen points to it <_Doc_5_> No, not the funnel cakes, the paintings! This IS an art fair, isn't it? Well, of course it's an art fair. But there's not a painting booth next to me - obviously. It was a man, red hair, about your height. He was selling painting reproductions. Please - it's very important! * _Doc_5_ examines the grass in the empty spot That space was rented out to a company, but they never came to occupy it. * _Doc_5_ notices that there are grooves where the grass has been tamped down by the missing booth <_Doc_5_> Now, please, don't insult my intelligence. Something WAS here... and now it's gone. I never saw anything, except funnel cakes. And don't get snippy with *me*. * SarahJane cranes her neck and looks around the nearby aisles but doesn't see anything resembling the art booth * SarahJane looks down at the Doctor * _Doc_5_ shoves his hands in his pockets and walks away * Jakkelsen calls after him * _Doc_5_ stops <_Doc_5_> Yes? Erm...you wouldn't care for a nice ceramic vase, would you? * _Doc_5_ scowls * SarahJane takes the Doctor by the arm Come along, Doctor, let's continue to look. * Jakkelsen shrugs and takes a look at the empty space again * Blue_Boy scampers through the darkness. * Blue_Boy spies a potential victim. * Jakkelsen calls over to the lady selling dog shirts on the other side of his booth * Pom_Lady sits in her booth selling pomeranian T-shirts You ever see an art shop selling reproductions around here? * Pom_Lady looks over Erm...no, nothing like that. Me neither. Ah, well. * Jakkelsen goes back to counting his money * Blue_Boy crawls into the side of the booth. * Pom_Lady adjusts some hanging shirts and grins at the graphics * Blue_Boy tugs at the lady's skirt. * Pom_Lady looks down in surprise * _Blue_boy jumps up at the Pom Lady. * Pom_Lady startles * _Blue_boy hisses in the Lady's face. * Pom_Lady steps back and raises her hands to her face * Jakkelsen looks up at the hiss, but figures it's the woman's T-shirt equipment * _Blue_boy strangles the Pom Lady. * Pom_Lady tries to shriek * Pom_Lady struggles * Blue_Boy throttles the Pom Lady. * Pom_Lady slowly sinks to the ground * _Lance_ grabs the Blue Boy by the ankle * _Lance_ growls and snarls * Jakkelsen hears the snarl and is concerned You OK over there, Gloria? * Blue_Boy looks at the dog and snarls back, only louder. * _Lance_ digs his teeth into the Blue Boy's ankle * Pom_Lady digs at the stubby fingers * Blue_Boy clings to the Pom Lady's neck. * Pom_Lady starts to turn blue * Jakkelsen is worried that he hasn't heard an answer * Jakkelsen walks out of his booth * _Lance_ hangs on tenaciously as the Blue Boy shakes his leg * Pom_Lady kicks out her leg and upsets the booth * Jakkelsen jumps back as Gloria's booth rocks alarmingly * Blue_Boy morphs its leg, trying to shake Lance off. * Blue_Boy howls in rage. * _Lance_ is shaken off and flies over against the collapsing booth * _Lance_ yipes in distress * Blue_Boy looks threateningly at the dog. * Jakkelsen dashes over and peers behind the counter, to see Gloria lying on the ground with a creature at her neck * Blue_Boy hisses up at Jakkelsen. * Pom_Lady thrashes weakly and stops * Jakkelsen runs back to his booth and grabs an urn * Jakkelsen runs over to the boy in blue silk and bashes him with the ceramic urn * Blue_Boy staggers. * CoffeeCellar, hearing the noise, runs over and throws hot coffee on the boy in blue * Blue_Boy sizzles. * Jakkelsen continues hitting the boy with the urn * Jakkelsen stops and realizes what he's doing - beating a child?! * Pom_Lady lies blue and lifeless * Jakkelsen slowly makes sure that the Pom Lady is OK * Jakkelsen feels her pulse and realizes she's dead * Blue_Boy goes all soggy and starts breaking up. * Blue_Boy hisses: I'm melting! * _Doc_5_ hears the commotion from several booths away * _Doc_5_ rushes back to the scene of the commotion * SarahJane turns around to face the Doctor and realizes he is no longer there Hey! * SarahJane starts running after the Doctor <_Doc_5_> What's happening here? * Jakkelsen looks up at the Doctor That boy - he killed her! It killed the dog lady! And there goes a good pot of coffee, too. * Blue_Boy falls messily to the ground. * Blue_Boy is paper pulp. * Jakkelsen looks at the boy and blinks It wasn't a boy? * _Doc_5_ sees the Blue Boy * _Doc_5_ looks at the carnage in horror <_Doc_5_> No! I thought it was immobilized! * __Lance_ struggles to his feet and sadly licks his mistress' face * paper_pulp gives a final bubble. * SarahJane catches up with the Doctor and looks around in amazement and horror Oh no! * CoffeeCellar bends down to pet Lance * __Lance_ lies down and softly cries * paper_pulp lies there messily. * _Doc_5_ looks guiltily at the dead Pom_Lady <_Doc_5_> This is all my fault! * Jakkelsen is rather shellshocked What was that thing?! <_Doc_5_> You must tell me! Where did the merchant that had this booth go? I don't know! I've told you already, there was never a booth there. I saw him go off with some foxy chick. * _Doc_5_ turns to the CoffeeCellar <_Doc_5_> You saw the booth? Yeah...good looking dude, gave me his card. * __Lance_ struggles to his feet and starts to growl at something in the distance * _Doc_5_ notices the little dog's agitation * __Lance_ hesitantly barks <_Doc_5_> Lance is trying to tell us something! * _Doc_5_ looks at the little dog He sees something? * __Lance_ barks and barks * _Doc_5_ bends down and looks into the dog's eyes <_Doc_5_> Can you track the scent of the creature? * __Lance_ bares his teeth * SarahJane looks on as dog and Time Lord communicate mentally <_Doc_5_> Show us where it went! * _Doc_5_ stands up and gets ready to follow the dog Hey, no cruelty to animals, mister! * __Lance_ looks up at the Doc * __Lance_ shoots off into the distance * _Doc_5_ follows <_Doc_5_> Come on, Sarah Jane, Timmy may be in trouble! * SarahJane looks at CoffeeCellar What? Don't worry, the Doctor has plenty of experience with caring for animals. He'd better...I'm a member of the Humane Society! * SarahJane follows Doc5 * Jakkelsen returns, shaken, to his booth * __Lance_ runs to the car park * _Doc_5_ follows <_Doc_5_> There! That man over there, loading his van! * __Lance_ stops and barks insanely at a man putting some boxes into a van * __Lance_ stops short and growls * Pendrell looks down at the dog Hi, puppy. * Pendrell pats the dog on the head * _Doc_5_ runs up, out of breath <_Doc_5_> You! You sold us a fake painting! * Pendrell looks up * CoffeeCellar watches curiously Oh, hello again, sir. I'm sorry - did you have some problem with the painting? <_Doc_5_> You might say that. You knew it was an alien killing device, didn't you! * Pendrell laughs An...alien killing device? * __Lance_ barks and runs around some large boxes * SarahJane keeps an eye on the little dog and quietly takes out her camera What is he babbling about, Pendy baby? * Pendrell looks around nervously and is relieved to see the coffee seller I'm not at all sure. <_Doc_5_> Let's have a look at your other paintings. * Pendrell indicates the interior of the van, full of more reproductions of the same painting * __Lance_ sniffs at a box and backs away from it, growling <__Lance_> GRRRRRRRRR! * _Doc_5_ grabs the box Lance indicated <_Doc_5_> Let's just have a look at this * _Doc_5_ opens the carton <_Doc_5_> Yes... looks like a perfect copy of the Blue Boy, doesn't it? Too perfect! * Pendrell shrugs The company only hires the best artists. <_Doc_5_> You know perfectly well that no artists were ever involved! * _Doc_5_ stares at Pendrell * __Lance_ backs up and chuffs and whines Of course they were! Where do you think this painting came from, then? Oh, wait - that's right, I forgot. It's an alien killing device. <_Doc_5_> The question is... why? Why do you want to loose these killing devices on unsuspecting art lovers? * Pendrell sighs in exasperation and turns away * Pendrell walks up to the driver's seat of the van and gets in * __Lance_ moves closer to Sarah Jane's ankles * SarahJane reaches down and pats the sweet little doggie What's the matter, Pendy? This man is nuts. * _Doc_5_ takes a pocket knife out of his pocket <_Doc_5_> If this is a $200 reproduction, you won't mind if I destroy it, will you? Of course I do! * Pendrell gets back out of the van * _Doc_5_ opens the pocket knife and gets ready to slash the painting You're paying for it if you ruin it! * Pendrell grabs the Doctor's wrist <_Doc_5_> I think you're the one who's going to pay! * _Doc_5_ brings the knife closer to the painting Buy it first, then you can do whatever you want with it. But if you mess it up, my boss'll kill me. <_Doc_5_> I'll just scratch off a bit of paint for analysis. * Blue_Boy jumps out of the painting at the Doctor. Fine, but take it from the - whoa! * Pendrell leaps back * CoffeeCellar lets out a little shriek * Blue_Boy hisses and grabs at the Doctor's neck. * _Doc_5_ fends off the attacker <_Doc_5_> See! What did I tell you! * Pendrell is astonished * __Lance_ yips and growls * _Doc_5_ gets the Blue Boy in a head lock * Pendrell grabs the Doctor's pocket knife and plunges it into the figure's neck * __Lance_ lunges for the Boy's ankle again * _Doc_5_ pushes the Blue Boy to the ground * Blue_Boy struggles and snarls. <_Doc_5_> Quick, hot liquid killed the last one. Anyone have a pot of tea? * __Lance_ snarls back Erm - no! There's more coffee at my stall! * Pendrell looks at the coffee girl I can't believe I never noticed anything wrong about them! What a doof! You're not a doof, Pendy! * Blue_Boy swipes up at the Doctor's face. * __Lance_ bounces around Blue Boy's head, trying to bite his fingers <_Doc_5_> Sarah! The radiator, see if the engine is hot. He has been idling the engine while he loads up. Drain some water from the radiator! * _Blue_boy fires spittle up at the Doctor. <_Doc_5_> That was very rude! * _Doc_5_ slams the Blue Boy's head into the pavement * Blue_Boy claws at the Doctor's hand. * __Lance_ sits back and watches the humans * Pendrell grabs a spare coffee cup from his friend, then runs to the radiator to drain some of the water * CoffeeCellar runs back to the stall * _Doc_5_ struggles with the Blue Boy * Pendrell watches the cup fill, hoping the Doctor can cope * SarahJane tries to help the Doctor hold down the Blue Boy * Blue_Boy howls. * Pendrell then races back and carefully pours the water on the knife wound * Blue_Boy shrieks and bubbles. * CoffeeCellar struggles back with 4 pots of expensive coffee Um, you are going to pay for this, right? I'll pay for it. * CoffeeCellar dumps some more coffee on the Blue Boy * Blue_Boy starts disintegrating messily. * _Doc_5_ stands back and brushes at the coffee stains on his faun coat * Blue_Boy turns into another pile of mulched paper. * __Lance_ sniffs at the mess Doctor, what IS going on?? Are there more of these paintings in the van? Yes, there are...well...lots of them. * Pendrell indicates the other boxes of paintings <_Doc_5_> The paintings, Sarah. They're shapeshifting androids. * SarahJane gasps Androids! <_Doc_5_> Of course hot water dissolves them. As it will any papier-mache object. I think you need to take them through a car wash... strapped to the roof of your van. * Pendrell thinks about this How do I get them onto the roof? <_Doc_5_> We'll help you. Have some bungee cords? No, of course not. <_Doc_5_> Well, all these paintings are going to have to be dissolved. Otherwise, no one will be safe. * Pendrell thinks - where would they have large quantities of hot water? * __Lance_ returns to Sarah Jane's side * SarahJane picks up the little dog and cuddles it <_Doc_5_> And Sarah, don't get too attached to that little dog... we really can't have pets in the TARDIS. WHAT?? We can't -- huh? <_Doc_5_> I mean, you can't simply take a dog out for walkies when you're in the vortex, can you? What about K - * SarahJane shushes herself * Pendrell looks at Sarah What? * __Lance_ paws Sarah Jane's foot lightly and look up at her sooo saaadly It's okay, little doggie, you're all right. * __Lance_ cries softly * __Lance_ wags his tail hopefully Um, I can take care of him... <_Doc_5_> Now, come on, Sarah, I believe we've done all we can here. * __Lance_ follows Sarah * SarahJane turns around and looks down at Lance Aww, come here, little guy. Look, CoffeeCellar will take good care of you. * __Lance_ whimpers * SarahJane picks up Lance and hands him to CoffeeCellar * CoffeeCellar scratches Lance on the ears But what about the paintings?! <_Doc_5_> As I told you. Spray them with hot water. Where am I going to get that much hot water?! There's always coffee pots. * CoffeeCellar shrugs * _Doc_5_ calls back over his shoulder as he leaves: <_Doc_5_> Go to a car wash! * Pendrell moans I don't want to load all these boxes on the top of the truck! <_Doc_5_> Your problem... after all, WE weren't selling alien killing devices at an art fair. * Pendrell mumbles: I didn't know they were alien killing devices... He didn't know, you dork! * Pendrell sighs and starts shifting boxes * __Lance_ watches the strange humans go ::the end!::