26 July 1997 - ep 1 16 August 1997 - ep 2 Doctor Who - I Was a Time Lord Vampire from Outer Space starring Ben Jackson and Leela Benjamin (chrisben@icok.net) - Benjamin BGhoti (ghoti42@ix.netcom.com) - _JohnnyB_, Strella, Erkk, Cheesy_60s_fX, The_Wind_, A_spear, A_flock_of_sleeping_birds, Trevormistornivertiblad, Things, Pieces-of-Erkk, Naala, Somewhere, Ryanbitrinsicnestifor Bob01 (bla@gate.net) - vampirebob01, timelordbob, castellan_righes Haem (haem@lys.vnet.net) - _LauraP_, DoctorMorgan, Ihp, ChancellorEnrhod, Ihp-wolf, Ihp-spider, Ihp-bat Jondar (jondar@fl.net.au) - corny_60s_special_effect, Leela_ --------------------------------------------------------------------------- ::teaser:: * _LauraP_ strolls through Disneyland, grinning at everything around her * _JohnnyB_ spots his chance... <_LauraP_> Ooh, there's a neat ride! * _LauraP_ runs toward it, hoping to get in line <_JohnnyB_> Oh, not the Small World! That makes me sick! * _LauraP_ pulls a walnut out of her pocket, cracks it, and munches while she waits * _JohnnyB_ joins Laura in line <_LauraP_> Want one, Johnny? * _LauraP_ offers him a walnut <_JohnnyB_> Naw, you go ahead. <_LauraP_> Oh, all right, Johnny. * _JohnnyB_ spots an empty boat about to depart <_JohnnyB_> Here, Babe, this one's ours... * _LauraP_ smiles airily at him and climbs into the boat * _JohnnyB_ sits reeeeal close to Laura <_LauraP_> Groovy. * _LauraP_ giggles * _JohnnyB_ tries to block the incessant singing out of his head and prepares for "the moment"... * _LauraP_ snuggles up * vampirebob01 lurks in the shadows * _JohnnyB_ leans in close and... * corny_60s_special_effect appears and snatches LauraP away * _JohnnyB_ tries to smooch thin air <_JohnnyB_> Huh? Laura? Laura?! LAURA?!!! * _JohnnyB_ emerges from the tunnel twenty minutes later, raving about evil children ***** * _LauraP_ suddenly finds herself on a dusty...rock! <_LauraP_> Ewww! * _LauraP_ stands up and brushes off her bellbottoms * _LauraP_ looks around - this is not part of the ride... <_LauraP_> Johnny? Hello, dear. * _LauraP_ twirls <_LauraP_> Oh...hiya. * _LauraP_ smiles What happened? You were at that ride, and you came here, right? Were you at Disneyland, then you came here? <_LauraP_> Yeah! How did you know? Ms? <_LauraP_> Laura, Laura Petrie. * _LauraP_ holds out a hand to shake <_LauraP_> Would you like a walnut? Well, this happened to me, Ms. Petrie. <_LauraP_> You too, huh? Yeah. I think it's some reject Stone Age area. Don't know where, though. * _LauraP_ shrugs and eats the walnut she had offered * Strella sweeps onto the scene, replete in cumbersome velvet cloak and heels Well, my dear, you look tired. I think you need some sleep... oh, this is Strella. She came here by the same thing. * _LauraP_ blinks at the woman - Strella? <_LauraP_> Wow, that's some cape. Bob! What are you doing? I'm starving, and you're chatting up the dinner... Sorry. * Strella sweeps in and grabs Laura by the throat <_LauraP_> Yaah -! * _LauraP_ gasps and tugs at Strella's hand <_LauraP_> Oh Johnny! Quiet, you snivelling morsel! * Strella flashes great fangs * _LauraP_ tries to scream, but it comes out like a squeak * Strella tears into the flesh of Laura's neck * Strella laps up the blood as it pours out Hey, I want some, too. * vampirebob01 gets his fangs out and joins the soon to be bloodbath * _LauraP_'s mouth gapes open, then her head lolls to one side * Strella drops the body on the sand * _LauraP_ crumples * Strella flicks a drop of blood from her lip I've had better. And we still need MORE. * Strella glides away regally Yuk, type AB blood. Hate that stuff. Tastes like chicken! * Erkk watches the scene from behind a rock, his tiny brain trying to comprehend what happened ::title credits:: * Benjamin is walking along * Benjamin is going to the infirmary as part of his orders * _JohnnyB_ gibbers quietly in the brightly-colored infirmary * DoctorMorgan calls Johnny into the examination room * _JohnnyB_ continues gibbering, oblivious to the doctor * Benjamin goes into the infirmary Excuse me...sir? * DoctorMorgan walks over to Johnny and touches his shoulder lightly It's time for your appointment. <_JohnnyB_> Bibble, bibble... *flinch* * _JohnnyB_ takes a swing at the doctor * DoctorMorgan ducks, only just <_JohnnyB_> NO MORE CHILDREN! No-one said anything about...children. * DoctorMorgan is beginning to think that Johnny came to the wrong type of doctor * Benjamin looks inside and reports for his annual checkup * _JohnnyB_ turns and tries to run out the door Now, wait...! * _JohnnyB_ runs smack into Ben * DoctorMorgan starts to go after him * DoctorMorgan glances at his patient file Johnny - do you want to continue this examination, or shall I call for my next patient? * _JohnnyB_ struggles angrily with Ben in the doorway * DoctorMorgan hangs around nervously, not wanting to force Johnny to come when he seems so obviously upset * DoctorMorgan wonders why the boy even came in the first place Probably dragged here by security and they didn't even bother to tell me. * Benjamin recovers from his shock and proceeds to slug the boy * _JohnnyB_ collapses in a heap and cries softly Now, wait just a moment! This is a place of healing, not injury! Sorry, doc, but this bloke attacked me. <_JohnnyB_> Egypt... right next to the pyramids... *ZAP!* she's gone... * DoctorMorgan looks at the accented fellow and shrugs * _JohnnyB_ jumps up and yells at Ben <_JohnnyB_> I HAD TO RIDE THROUGH THE WHOLE THING -- ALONE! No more children, please... Umm, sure, mate, whatever you say... Out of my field of expertise. * DoctorMorgan goes to get his next patient * Benjamin looks around nervously * _JohnnyB_ sings softly "It's a small world, after all..." Listen, mate, why don't you go have a lie down? * Benjamin moves away slowly <_JohnnyB_> But she was right there, and then *ZAP*, she's gone! * Benjamin reports to the nurse about his wrist * Benjamin finds the nurse is gone Bloody... * Benjamin realizes it's just him and the madman in the main hall * Benjamin sees the madman blocks the exit * Benjamin slowly moves towards the man * Cheesy_60s_fX swirl around behind Ben * Benjamin mumbles sailors' curses about his ill luck * _JohnnyB_ starts to gibber more rapidly, and points * Benjamin begins to hear something * Benjamin turns.... * Cheesy_60s_fX moves in closer to Ben * Cheesy_60s_fX gobbles Ben up for dessert * _JohnnyB_'s mind loses one of its last anchors to reality * _JohnnyB_ lies down and drools ***** * Benjamin lies unconscious for a bit * Benjamin slowly wakes up * Benjamin gets up * Benjamin looks around Blimey! Where is this place? * Benjamin suddenly realizes he is being watched * Strella is staring hungrily at Ben My God, it got you, too. This is Strella and I'm Bob. * Strella looks crossly at Bob We do not introduce ourselves to our food! * Strella gives Bob the back of her hand * Strella mumbles under her breath: I should have left you on Gallifrey... * Benjamin looks around in fear * Strella grins, revealing long fangs * Strella runs her tongue across her teeth * Benjamin staggers back S-t-t-ay away! You know what blood type you are, lad? * Strella reaches out to grab Ben's arm Blood is blood. Feeding time, my dear. * vampirebob01 gets ready for some type A - good stuff, tastes like pizza * Benjamin jerks his arm back * Ihp returns from a hunting-and-gathering trip to see the two tall ones menacing yet another tall one - where do they all come from? * Strella hisses and raises her arms * The_Wind_ blows from nowhere to billow Strella's cloak * Benjamin looks for a place to run * Strella rises up off the ground * Benjamin begins to run * Strella flies off after Ben * vampirebob01 (doing his Superman flying thing) goes after Ben Blimey, where can I go? I don't even know where this place is! * Strella's metamorphosis completes... she is now a slightly anachronistic bat * Ihp suddenly spies food! A flying animal... * Ihp begins to drool, and picks up a rock * Benjamin runs towards Ihp but doesn't see him * Benjamin stumbles * Ihp flings the rock at the flying animal * Strella suddenly feels great pain in her head * Strella flops to the ground, unconscious * Ihp lets a triumphant yell out, then shuffles over to the grounded animal * Ihp reaches out and picks it up by a wing Strange... * Ihp snuffles at it * Benjamin gets up, bruised * Benjamin sees the primitive man in front of him Umm, t-t-hanks mate. * Ihp starts to take a nip from the wing * Strella's unconscious form metamophoses back to humanoid * Ihp is startled, and drops the animal-which-is-not-an-animal * Strella's arm bleeds from Ihp's bite That thing! What is it! * Ihp did not realize this was one of the tall ones * Ihp shuffles away Wait, wait! You can't leave me here all alone. * Ihp hears Benjamin, but doesn't really understand, and isn't sure quite what he is * Ihp's form is lost in the darkness Hello, Ben. * Benjamin spins around Look, mate - keep away! * A_spear hurtles out of the night at Bob Agggghhh! * Erkk leaps out from behind a rock, yelling * Benjamin jumps back * Erkk throws dirt and rocks at Bob... whatever he can get his hairy hands on Damn cavemen! Going to let them eat the damn human... * vampirebob01 flies away * Erkk gives a roar of victory * A_flock_of_sleeping_birds flies, startled, out of nearby trees * Erkk turns and looks at the Tall One with Strange Fur * Erkk looks Tall One up and down * Erkk sniffs Tall One * Erkk squints at Tall One * Erkk walks away, then turns back and gestures at Tall One * Erkk grunts: Come this way. Um, whatever you say, mate. * Erkk heads into the forest toward his clan's cave * Benjamin is half scared but doesn't know what else to do ***** Chancellor, I must protest yet again... It has been discussed for long enough. My decision is final. But the SAVAGE woman? Can she be trusted? We cannot afford to sit back any longer, and the savage is the only person here capable of doing what we require. If she fails... She will execute her mission adequately, and if discovered, she cannot be traced back to us. Of course, your Grace. Have you summoned her? Should we get the Doctor for this matter, sir? * Trevormistornivertiblad and Enrhod look at Bob, aghast Certainly not! Not as long as I have a regeneration left! If this... prattling undergraduate novitiate is finished, I shall go to summon her now. Please do, Trevormi. * Trevormistornivertiblad, with a grunt of disgust at the Time Lad, storms off down a dark corridor * Trevormistornivertiblad stops suddenly and grins to himself Yes, she shall perform her duty well. But Time Rings are so... unreliable. It would be a shame if hers returned... unaccompanied. * Trevormistornivertiblad chuckles softly to himself and goes to requisition a Time Ring ***** * Trevormistornivertiblad oozes the closest thing to charm he has ...and this shall be your "chariot" into the jungle. * Trevormistornivertiblad has been patronizing Leela for the past half hour * Trevormistornivertiblad hands Leela the Time Ring * _Leela glares at Trevormi, but takes the strange bracelet Do... you... un... der... stand? <_Leela> I understand, and there is no need to talk like that. Oh, right, erm, of course. Then... off you are. * _Leela looks down at the strange brac... er... Time Ring and touches it... No! Wait til I let go! * Trevormistornivertiblad and Leela begin to tumble down the time tunnel * Trevormistornivertiblad lets go of the ring and tumbles off into the void * Trevormistornivertiblad shouts Gallifreyan obscenities as he disappears somewhere in time * _Leela smiles, and looks around the void, seeing blackness * _Leela lands with a thump which causes her to fall unconscious briefly ***** * Erkk is still trying to offer food to the Tall One * Benjamin doesn't like the look or the smell of the "food" * Erkk grunts: Is best four-leg snarl thing meat... why you not eat? Uhm, no thanks, mate. I'm on a diet anyway. * Benjamin smiles * Erkk hears something outside * Erkk goes to investigate * Erkk makes "You wait here"-type hand gestures * Ihp, in his own cave, also hears a strange noise and lumbers out to see what it is * Benjamin struggles up to see the noise * Benjamin struggles but realizes he is in more pain than he thought * Erkk meets Ihp outside of the caves Erkk, you hear noise? Yes. We go see? More Tall Ones? * Ihp grunts agreement * Ihp shuffles off toward the noise place * Erkk invents small-talk on the way to see Is nice hunting weather, no? Yes. Me hit flying animal today. But then, animal is not animal. Good eating, flying animals. Yes, very good, usually. Not today. * _Leela groans * _Leela groans again and opens her eyes I sense the Time Ring...must alert Strella. Me spear four-leg snarl thing day before today. * Ihp congratulates Erkk on the snarl thing * _Leela's keen hunting sense alerts her to two lumbering shapes in the distance * Erkk stops short and sniffs the air Is Tall One, or not? * Ihp snuffles too No. Different smell. Scent is... familiar. Like jungle. Yes, like jungle. * Ihp shuffles further toward the source of the scent * Benjamin finally manages to get to the cave exit * Erkk peers around bushes * Erkk whispers to Ihp: Is woman! Woman! * Ihp has visions of dragging woman back to cave by hair Is not like Marka-mate, though. * _Leela 's keen hunting sense spots the two hiding behind bushes Is not as... hairy as Marka-mate. No hair? Is bumpier than Marka-mate. * _Leela gets up * Erkk's jaw drops in surprise What? Tell! * _Leela walks over to the bushes... Is coming this way! Ooh! * Ihp scampers away * Erkk falls flat on his ass <_Leela> Hello, have you seen a Benjackson? * Erkk looks up at the woman-not-like-others and gapes ***** * Benjamin tries to find out where Erkk got to * Ihp shuffles back to the cave * Ihp sees the tall one coming towards him and looks away * Benjamin sees Ihp * Ihp tries not to see Benjamin * Ihp is frightened of him * Benjamin is cautious about talking to the stupid caveman Ihp * Benjamin wonders where erkk got to * Ihp is mumbling "woman woman woman woman" * Benjamin wonders off in the direction Ihp came from ***** * Erkk continues to stare at the woman-not-like-other-women * _Leela looks at the strange man <_Leela> Hello, what is your name? * Erkk remembers he has a tongue... Is name Erkk. <_Leela> I am Leela, warrior of the Sevateem. Warrior? Is woman warrior? <_Leela> Yes. * Erkk points to his chest Is Erkk good hunter. <_Leela> Where am I? I don't know this place. * Erkk thinks... Is... here. Is this place. * Things get lost in the translation :) * _Leela looks down at the Time Ring and remembers <_Leela> Have you seen a Benjackson? Is what, Benjackson? * _Leela thinks <_Leela> A tall one, brown hair. Tall One? Is many Tall Ones. Is Tall One in cave! Come, me take you to Tall One. * Erkk shuffles off into the jungle * _Leela follows this strange Erkk ***** * Benjamin tries to find Erkk but gets lost Blimey! * Benjamin tries to backtrack * Benjamin now is hopelessly lost * vampirebob01 looks for a Time Ring * Benjamin fights the urge to panic Where is the Time Ring, you little man? * Benjamin turns and sees the vampire * vampirebob01 angrily slaps Ben to the ground and takes him away * Benjamin falls unconscious Whoever has the Time Ring will come after him...then we can go home and conquer Gallifrey, and then Strella can eat him! Hahahahaha! Good type A blood...going to have a pizza party tonight! Muhahahahahaha! ::end of first episode:: * Benjamin groans * Benjamin is unconscious in the woods * vampirebob01 sees his food and gets ready to eat * Benjamin struggles to wake himself up * Strella comes stomping out of the woods Where is that good-for-nothing...? Uh, Strella, what are you doing here? Bob! What's going on? * Benjamin feels the presence of other people and struggles to hear what they are saying Getting ready to eat, what does it look like? Someone's using a Time Ring nearby. Who is it? Not him. Well, yes, I can see that. He's just some human trash... dinner, a light snack maybe. * Strella waves at Ben dismissively * Benjamin is now fully awake but feigns still being asleep With time technology nearby, we have more important things to worry about. * Strella starts pacing the clearing * Benjamin thinks the "male" voice sounds rash and given to emotions * Benjamin thinks the "female" voice sounds like trouble With a Time Ring, we could fix our TARDIS and get off this mudball. Yeah, but we need the Time Ring. * Strella stops and glares at Bob Have you been listening to a word I've said? Of COURSE we need the Time Ring! But the appearance of a time traveller cannot be mere coincidence. Yeah, but he doesn't have it and I'm hungry!!! * Benjamin wonders if he should try to make a break for it We must act carefully. Can I eat him please? * Strella reaches out and picks Ben up by the throat No, Bob. Go suck on a rat. This one has more important tasks. What are you going to do with him, then? Ack! Let...me...go! * Strella looks at Ben and smiles...like a snake smiles at a mouse * Benjamin stuggles to free himself from the vice-like grip * Benjamin looks into her eyes and is in fear * Strella just smiles... and stares... and reaches down to quickly bite Ben on the neck * Benjamin screams Keep it quiet! Don't want the cavemen to hear. There. That should do it. Shh... Shh... * Strella puts her finger over Ben's lips You keep screaming, and Bob here will have to eat you. * Benjamin stops screaming * Benjamin feels numb except for the blood tricking down his neck The wound will close soon. You'll be fine. * Strella sets Ben down. Until the hunger kicks in... * Benjamin feels a wave of coldness coming over him Now, there *is* a cure for your condition...but not here on this planet, not now. * Benjamin begins to lose the love he feels for his family and friends - cold to everyone Strella, you didn't do what I think you did? You made him one of us! Now I have to share food with two vamps! * Strella casually backhands Bob, sending him across the clearing * vampirebob01 gets up and curses sliently to Strella If we had, say, a Time Ring... then maybe we could leave. * Strella makes a campy "I have an idea" face, lacking on the lightbulb over the head Say, now. I think there's one lying around here someplace. If you were to... I don't know... go and get it for us, maybe we could see about having you cured. * Strella leans in close to Ben's face and summons all her sultriness ...Do we have a deal? Strella, you are really bad, you know that? * Benjamin has no willpower and will do as Strella says * Benjamin obeys Where...do I find...one? * Strella frowns Hmm. This one seems defective. * Strella slaps Ben across the face * Benjamin awakens * Benjamin feels the numbness subsiding, to be replaced by fear Strella, food - er, people - coming near. Look, monkeyboy, are you going to go fetch us a bleedin' time ring, or what? Hmmm, sure... * Benjamin is still not fully aware of the situation but feels his time is short * Benjamin just knows that cold fear is in him "Hmmm, sure..." That doesn't sound like you mean it, boy! * Strella sighs Well, Bob, you may get to eat him after all. Let's go. Oh goody. * Strella starts to leave the clearing, turns around and grabs Bob by the arm, and hauls him off with her * Benjamin sit back down, not fully aware of the situation * Benjamin only knows he must find a time ring and soon * Benjamin feels a hunger growing in him * Benjamin gets up * Benjamin moves back towards the caves ***** * Erkk is showing Leela around the cave ...and this where sleep. * Erkk points at bundle of mangy furs * Leela_ looks at the surroundings... very similar to being with the Sevateem Is nice, no? * Benjamin leaves the woods and soon comes to Erkk's cave * Benjamin decides to begin his search here * Benjamin knows time is short * Ihp hears noises and shuffles to the door of his cave * Ihp smells Erkk in his cave - with *woman*! And Tall One, just over there. Is place to raise family, no? Err... yes, very nice. * Erkk is leering at Leela Is good hunter, me. * Leela_ gives Erkk a cold look I am already mated. * Erkk's face falls Is good time to be over there. * Erkk points to corner and goes to hide behind a rock * Benjamin stumbles into Erkk's cave * Leela_ quickly hides behind the rock * Ihp suddenly realizes that the Tall One smells strange * Ihp sees the Tall One go into Erkk's cave and slowly creeps forward to see what he's doing * Benjamin is in the main cave and sees the trappings of a dirty single caveman * Erkk whimpers slightly Is you not going my nice bits tear off, yes? * Leela_ gives Erkk another stare * Benjamin hears the sounds of two people * Leela_ peers from behind the rock... she's certain that's Ben Jackson, the one she is after * Erkk stops worrying about his gonads and sniffs the air * Benjamin is searching Erkk's cave * Erkk whispers: Is Tall One, but smells funny. * Leela_ whispers to Erkk: Smells funny? How? Smells like flying mouse. Is good eating, flying mouse. * Leela_ can't tell the difference... then stops... she can * Benjamin stops searching and hears someone approaching * Ihp shuffles up behind the Tall One What you doing? * Ihp is ready to run if the Tall One looks mad, but is very curious * Benjamin turns and sees Ihp * Ihp decides that the Tall One looks mad! I need the time ring! * Ihp cowers back and turns to run * Leela_ takes this opportunity to come out from hiding * Erkk stands behind Leela and stares Give it to me! Time is short! * Benjamin grabs Ihp * Ihp says "sorry sorry sorry" as he tries to get away * Benjamin is given to an overwhelming hunger * Benjamin can't help himself and attacks Ihp * Ihp screams as Ben's new fangs rip through the thick muscle in his neck No no no no teeeeeeeeeth! * Benjamin suddenly realizes what he is doing * Benjamin stops and throws Ihp to the ground * Ihp grunts as his body hits the rocky floor Ben Jackson! Is that you? What are you doing!! * Leela_ moves to confront Ben Is not Benjaksohn, is flying mouse person! * Leela_ turns to Erkk Flying mouse person? * Leela_ remembers her tribal legends - evil ones! - and takes out her knife * Benjamin moves to say he is sorry to Ihp but just falls silent * Benjamin doesn't even realize Leela is present at first * Ihp is just sorry he upset the Tall One - didn't know he was one of those flying mouse people * Benjamin regains himself * Leela_ holds her knife at the ready, waiting for Ben's next move * Erkk grabs a handy club and raises it * Erkk makes to bring the club down on Ben's head * Leela_ notices Erkk with the club No! Don't do that! * Benjamin looks up * Erkk is surprised, and his aim is thrown off * Ihp shivers in the sudden cold * Ihp stands up with the aim of warming himself up, and is surprised to find that every muscle in his body is on fire Who are you? Is person going to smash you, flying mouse person! * Erkk takes another swing with the club * Benjamin stumbles back away from Erkk * Erkk is confused -- how does Benjaksohn keep dodging the blows? * Leela_ tries to calm Erkk down * Leela_ turns back to Ben, but keeps the knife by her side I am Leela. I am a Warrior of the Sevateem, or at least I was. I'm Ben....Ben Jackson...or at least I was. * Ihp shudders again and puts a hand to his neck...the pain is slowly going away, but he still feels cold I - I really don't know who I am now. * Benjamin sees Erkk * Benjamin doesn't want to hurt Erkk but feels he must * Leela_ sees that words aren't going to stop Erkk, and moves to him, trying to get the club from him * Ihp looks up at Erkk, his eyes red Erkk. I do not wish to hurt you. Is good. Is no want to be hurt. Is want to hurt! * Erkk takes another swing with the club Keep away, mate! * Benjamin grabs the club * Erkk stops in mid-blow * Benjamin pushes Erkk towards the wall with inhuman strength * Ihp feels incredibly hungry, and knows that he is not hungry for flying mouse meat any longer * Erkk squeals in terror and runs to the mouth of the cave * Ihp sees that Erkk is otherwise occupied and turns his attentions to Leela * Erkk runs right into Ihp * Ihp is knocked back by Erkk's weight * Ihp looks hungrily at Erkk Is no time to stop, is leaving now! * Erkk grabs Ihp and runs into the night with him Food! *You* food! No, food later. Running now. * Ihp growls and chases Erkk Is good, run fast. * Erkk is totally oblivious to being chased ***** * Leela_ turns back to Ben. * Benjamin stops and looks at Leela Ben, are you all right? You look unwell. * Benjamin looks down and is ashamed No, I'm not all right. I almost killed a man. All I know is, I need to find something called a time ring. * Leela_ stops short... a Time Ring! How does he know about that? How do you know about a Time Ring? I-I-I was told I need it. I must get home. Do you know where it is? * Leela_ decides not to tell the truth, for the moment No, I don't know. I was brought here against my will. And that cave man - I-I attacked him, injured him. We have to help him. I know. I will find him later. He seems to be fine. Leela? Are you one of the Doctor's people? Ever since I was brought here, I can't help but think the Doctor is involved. The Doctor? How do you know about him? I travelled with for a time. So did I. I've been looking for him. I am not one of the Doctor's people. Oh. * Benjamin looks disappointed I need to find this time ring...I need it. If you can't help me, then I will search alone. * Leela_ resheaths her knife, satisfied that Ben is all right Why do you need it? I just need it. * Benjamin starts to resume his search then notices Leela's arm * Benjamin realizes that this must be it * Benjamin measures up Leela preparing to grab it * Leela_ quickly tries to hide the ring, but fails * Leela_ looks at Ben, alarmed. Ben! What's wrong? What are you doing? * Benjamin launches at Leela, eyes like an animal's Give it to me! * Benjamin is totally consumed with vampiric rage * Leela_ only just sidesteps the attack and turns, knife at the ready Ben! What's happening to you! * Leela_ then notices Ben's teeth... and the fangs... Give it to me! * Benjamin looks more wolflike * Leela_ stands her ground, uncertain what to do - she doesn't want to harm Ben, but she might just have to do that * Benjamin launches at Leela again * Benjamin's fighting ability is savage * Benjamin attempts to tear the ring off Leela's arm * Leela_ tries to evade again, this time failing, and has her arm scratched * Leela_ tries to attack Ben, but his attacks are forcing hers to go wide * Benjamin succeeds in getting the time ring off * Benjamin leaps up off Leela and starts to run out of the cave * Leela_ tries to run after Ben * Benjamin disappears into the night * Leela_ fails after a few minutes... his speed is amazing! ***** * Erkk finally stops running Erkk! You stop! Me...need food! * Erkk is panting Is... no... time... to... hunt... now... * Ihp latches onto Erkk's arm, fingernails digging in painfully Tall... woman is... OWWWWWWOWOWOWOO! What you doing, Ihp? * Ihp lets go, surprised, then sees the drops of blood on his claws * Ihp starts licking his fingers earnestly Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...this good. You want some? * Ihp offers a thumb * Erkk looks at Ihp for a moment * Ihp smiles wickedly, showing fangs * Erkk turns and runs * Ihp glows red, and with a pop, turns into a wolf Is not good day... * Ihp-wolf snarls and hares after Erkk * Ihp-wolf launches himself at Erkk's back * Ihp-wolf glows again and turns back into himself * Leela_ runs into the clearing just in time to see a wolf change into Ihp... not another vampire! * Ihp's mouth gapes wide as he goes for Erkk's throat * Erkk struggles in vain * Ihp slurps away happily, then tires of this * Ihp turns back into a wolf and starts ripping Erkk to shreds gleefully * Erkk gets torn to shreds * Ihp-wolf grabs bits of Erkk between his jaws and tears * Pieces-of-Erkk go flying around the clearing * Pieces-of-Erkk hang from the trees * Leela_ watches this attack from a distance * Ihp-wolf, finally satisfied, morphs into a spider and scuttles off * Leela_ sees that she can do nothing for Ihp at the moment, so tries to find Ben ***** * Naala waits in her cave Is where stoopid mate Ihp? * Ihp-spider scuttles to the mouth of the cave * Naala sees a spider approaching * Ihp-spider glows red and shifts back into his normal shape * Naala reaches over for her club and smashes spider into dirt Ow! * Ihp rubs the bump on his head Why hit? Where you been? Hunting. Oh, is fine for me sit here and worry! * Ihp scuffs his foot in the dirt Sorry. You off with other stoopid men, I know! No. Only Erkk, and Tall One, and woman. Where Erkk? Um...Erkk...not here now. Um what? What mean "um"? Where Erkk then? * Ihp thinks of a good answer Erkk...eating. You no tell truth when you have to think so long. Me tell truth! You no tell truth. You no good hunter, neither. Me kill two flying mouse creatures other day. Oooooooh. Flying mouse things! So hard to kill, flying mouse things! Me kill five this morning! You not half man Errk be. You want mate Erkk?! CANNOT MATE ERKK!!! ERKK DEAD! * Ihp stops and bites his lip What you say? Me say...Erkk...shed. Yes. Erkk shed old furs. He no shed on *me*. Is Ihp hair me find in bathing hole. Must go now. * Naala hears a child cry Must get food that me catch! You no go! Not after waking up Errk Jr! * Ihp stomps away, not hearing her You put Erkk Jr back to bed! * Naala grumbles Stoopid man. * Naala leans down to kiss her child Shh, Erkk Jr. * Naala looks at child Him have father's eyes. Not ugly eyes like Ihp. * Ihp turns into a bat and flaps away angrily ***** * Leela_ continues her search through the woods, her keen hunting sense alerting her to the fact that Ben is nearby * Benjamin is being called to by an unearthly voice * Benjamin stumbled towards Stella Strella? Strella, the monkey has the time ring!!! Yess, Bob, I sseeee. * Benjamin arrives at Strella and Bob This issss very goood. * Benjamin stops * Benjamin glares at the devilish duo Bring it here, child, bring it here... * Benjamin hesitates Bring it HERE! I...I...almost killed an innocent caveman because of you! * Benjamin spits out the words I'm weeping. Give me the ring. Bring it HERE, YOU WORTHLESS HUMAN!!! Cold blooded... * Leela_ follows her sense and arrives near where Ben is, but remains unseen for the moment * Strella reaches out and grabs it out of Ben's hands We leave now? * Strella stares at the ring Hmm? * Benjamin jumps a bit Oh, yessss. We leave now. Please, let's leave now. * vampirebob01 senses something amiss Goood. Can I kill him now? * Strella heads toward a cave mouth Yessss, Bob. You may kill him. Goood! HAHAHAA!!! Jussst sssave sssome for me. OK. * vampirebob01 looks at the confused human * Benjamin stumbles back in fear What blood type are you, boy? * Benjamin suddenly realizes he is a vampire too and is not defenseless Don't even think about attacking me, boy, you're only half. I'll kill you in a second! * Benjamin bears his fangs - would you like to know! I belive the human term is bring it on! YOU SHALL DIE!! * Benjamin hisses at Bob * Leela_ sees the woman with the ring and steps out of hiding * Leela_ looks at the woman What are you doing with that ring? * Strella looks at the savage woman Oh, not another one of you. Shoo! Shoo! Go away! Go... invent soap or something... I am not a savage! I am Leela, Warrior of the Sevateem! * Strella looks bemused I do believe that was an entire sentence! How quaint. * vampirebob01 looks at the women whoop !@#$ do * vampirebob01 looks back for Ben, but Ben is gone * Benjamin sees Bob distracted and attacks Agh! * vampirebob01 turns into a wolf and jumps on Ben * Benjamin moves behind Bob and attacks * Benjamin grabs Bob What are you doing with the Time Ring? I'm leaving this godsforsaken mudball and going back to Gallifrey! But I could do with a snack, first. Gallifrey! You're a Time Lord! The Chancellor never told me this! * vampirebob01 throws Ben to the wall * Benjamin hits the wall hard * Strella floats up off the ground, a convenient wind whipping her red velvet cloak around her * Strella's eyes glow * Strella hisses * Leela_ sees the glowing eyes, and averts her eyes... don't want the eye color to change again... * Strella swoops down at Leela and swipes with her talons * Leela_ avoids the attack The Chancellor sent you, eh? Then he shall be the first to join us! Yes, he did... I was instructed to rescue Ben. * Strella swoops down at Leela again * Strella grabs Leela by the arms and lifts her up into the air Put me down! * Leela_ struggles in the vicelike grip * vampirebob01 throws Ben and gets ready to kill him * Benjamin struggles against Bob * Benjamin feels like every bone in his body is breaking Well, women, Ben here will be hanging in the trees in five minutes...one part there and there.... * Benjamin is almost unconscious You thought you could beat me, boy! You will now die! * vampirebob01 turns into human form again * vampirebob01 throws Ben toward Leela * Benjamin is bloodied and broken * Strella cackles malevolently * Strella drags Leela higher into the air The Time Lords are WEAK! They are HELPLESS! If you are the best they can send against me, then we shall march through the Citadels like reapers at the harvest! * Benjamin tries and gets up; a wave a nausea almost overtakes him * vampirebob01 hits him to the ground * Benjamin feels his mouth full of blood * Benjamin summons his last strength to flee * Leela_ lashes out with her feet towards the woman Oof! * Strella lets go of Leela and they plummet back toward the ground * Leela_ kicks her again with all her might Oof! * Strella and Leela hit, Strella breaking Leela's fall * Leela_ recovers first and starts a full blown attack, knife flashing * Strella takes Leela's fist in her face * Strella takes another kick to the stomach * vampirebob01 sees Strella in trouble, thinking Ben dead, and attacks the woman * Benjamin stumbles out * Leela_ lashes out at the woman with her knife, slashing her arm Aaaaaaiaiiie! * vampirebob01 moves in on the woman Die! * Leela_ turns on the man, angry at him for hurting Ben * Strella stumbles to her feet, grabs Bob, and runs toward the cave What, Strella! I want to kill her! We are GOING! Just LOOK at my dress! Buy a new one. Do you know how hard it is to find crushed velvet that doesn't make you look like a tramp? Now shut up and into the TARDIS! Oh yeah...we have the Time Ring and they're stranded here! Hahaaa! * Strella throws Bob behind a suspicious rock in the cave Ouch! * Strella races to the console and plunges the door lever Is it ready? * vampirebob01 sees that all is ready * Strella doesn't answer * Strella takes a deep breath * Strella reaches out and grabs Bob by the garlic bulbs I. Have. Had. Enough. Of. You. * Strella pulls a double-headed spear from behind the console and rams it through bob's chest * vampirebob01 regenerates * Strella watches Bob cycle through all his regenerations, skewered by the spear * Strella walks over to the pile of Bob dust and looks at it * Strella stomps up and down on the dust pile for good measure I should know better than to bond with a Chancellory Guard... Well, it saves me the trouble of killing him later. * Strella fits the Time Ring into the console and steps back * Strella smiles to herself Here's to Strella, the next Empress of Gallifrey! * Strella hits the demat switch * Leela_ recovers and runs to the TARDIS, only to see it dematerialise... * Leela_ now realises she and Ben are stranded... * Strella's smile begins to fade It shouldn't be doing *that*... * Strella watches the walls shimmer and turn translucent * Strella stares into the swirling colors of the vortex No. * Strella is shredded to ribbons by the Time Winds ***** * Somewhere in time... * Trevormistormivartiblad looks up from his beer What was that? ***** * Benjamin lays up next to a tree * Benjamin feels like he is dying * Leela_ turns around, and sees Ben laying against a tree... * Benjamin looks up at Leela with bloodied eyes * Leela_ walks over to Ben, uncertain * Benjamin turns away, ashamed I'm sorry. This is all my fault. Do not worry... * Leela_ stares at Ben and notices that he is changing... going back to normal Ben? How are you feeling now? I...I feel better. * Benjamin is still bloodied and bruised * Benjamin however is no longer cold * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor's TARDIS grinds into reality * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor opens the doors After you, Castellan. Thank you. Leela, how are you, my dear? * Leela_ sees a bat flying to the clearing... but it too is changing... * castellan_righes notices the bat too * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor recoils from the bat * Ihp-bat squeaks AAaaaaaaaaaaaah...! * Ihp plummets to the ground * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor prods Ihp with his foot Ahh, so what's your name, human? Ben, sir. * Benjamin tries to get up and fails * Leela_ turns and helps Ben up Ben...Ben...ah yes, you were with the Doctor's second life. Second life? * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor pulls a walking stick out of his robes and pokes Ihp with it * Ihp is quite unconscious * Benjamin sees Ihp * Benjamin struggles to get up and see him * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor jumps back when Ihp makes a small grunting noise * Ihp opens an eye and glares at Ryanbitrinsicnestifor * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor scurries away from the caveman * Benjamin is concerned about Ihp * Benjamin ignores his own injuries What happened to the vampires...? Er, Castellan, shouldn't you tell Leela about the, um, malfunction? * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor keeps a wary eye on Ihp What malfunction? * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor eagerly jumps in Trevormi. He tied the end of the quorex throughput into the sub-tryptic relays... * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor makes complex hand gestures * Leela_ nods at Ryanbit... not really understanding Well, if they put the Time Ring in their TARDIS, it blew up in the Vortex. Their model was a Type 30 and wasn't designed to do that. * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor glances at the Castellan * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor looks at Leela * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor sighs * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor mumbles under his breath "cretins" What was that, Ryanbi? * Ihp finally gathers his wits back about them and struggles heavily to his feet Well, you want to go home. Yes, I want to go home. I'm sure K9 is missing me. Trevormi tampered with the Time Ring. You wouldn't have been able to use it to get home. I've told them that, Ryanbi. Please ready the TARDIS. I must disagree, Castellan, you mentioned a Type 30. Say your goodbyes and we will depart. The Type 30's were never produced. Their interstitial torque resonators kept flying off the spindle.. * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor is herded, protesting, back into the TARDIS * Benjamin looks at Ihp * Benjamin looks up to the Time Lords Will he be okay? Me be...no...not fine. Me kill Erkk. * Ihp puts a hand to his throbbing head Me find Naala... * Ihp staggers off toward the caves Yes, since the vampires are dead, the disease is gone. And that includes you, Ben. You're back to normal. * Leela_ turns to Ben... Goodbye, Ben. I will tell the Doctor what happened. If I see him... * Leela_ smiles * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor calls out of the TARDIS And you never even mentioned the crystal defraculatrix! Ryanbi, you want to be sent to Earth for a couple hundred years?! But... but... No buts. Ready the TARDIS. Fine. * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor mutters some more Prydonians! Think they run the universe! * Leela_ walks to the TARDIS, and steps inside, marveling at the console room. It's _nothing_ like the Doctor's! * Benjamin turns and leaves, battered and bruised Ben, where would you like to go, my boy? Uhm, well sir, I was in Disney World in 1973. July 12th, I think. Wouldn't know a trifurcated bevel rod if it bit them on the toe. Ryanbi, if you don't shut up, I'll make you ride Small World till your next regeneration!!! I'll set the coordinates, shall I, Righes? Good, Ryanbi. Disney 1973. * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor leans over to Leela and whispers conspiratorily Last time he set the coordinates, we wound up hip-deep in turnips. * Leela_ tries to supress a smile Ryanbi, stop looking at Leela! Set the coordinates! * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor enters the numbers Senile old git. Young ones, ugh!!! * Ryanbitrinsicnestifor hits the demat switch and... ::the end!::